What can I say ... sometimes I just need a bit of Billy Zane to brighten my day. And when those days come the Billy I turn to is the ridiculously bored Billy who doesn't give a damn AT ALL if people can tell he's mailing in his performance in Journey to Promethea. Yeah, I've run this a couple times before. It's still awesome. Give him any trouble and you will die this very day.
This is an old movie, right? 80s?
Oh, no. This is brand new. Written / directed / produced by Dan Garcia, a man who somehow has 21 production credits plus five directorial efforts, all of which (the directorial ones, I mean) he made in 2009 and all of which are currently listed in post production. I'm totally looking more of these up tomorrow ...
From the looks of things he might well have done the special effects by himself as well...
And from the sound of it, probably he's the composer too.
Classic.
Billy Zane stars in... "Kill Him, What is so Hard About That"
That's the better title as well, likely.
Yeah, the delivery on that line makes me laugh way too hard. On all of Billy's lines, really.
It's amazing that Zane is becoming so synonymous with bad movies now. It's almost as if he's an essential ingredient for making one. Wouldn't it be something if, 5 years from now, he pulled a "Mickey Rourke", and was up for an Oscar? :)
Well....
um...
On the bright side, it make Ewe Bowells' movies actually look "good" in comparison.
Dan Garcia: "This looks great, but let's replace the swords with lightsabers."
SFX Department: "Uh, they wouldn't have had lightsabers back in the middle ages."
DG: "No, seriously, lightsabers. Have you seen Star Wars? That's what made the film."
SFX: "I'm pretty sure we don't own the trademark on lightsabers anyway."
Billy Zane: "LIGHTSABERS! WHAT IS SO HARD ABOUT THAT?"
SFX: "Yes sir."
This is Zane's punishment for taking Kelly Brook away from me...
No comment (nuthin' hard about that.)
Oh Billy Zane how I love you! This screams for a double bill with IN THE NAME OF THE KING... Reynolds VS Zane!
Hey, Billy Zane has to eat.