Third HOBBIT Film Retitled 'HOLY CRAP, AREN'T WE DONE YET?'

Todd Brown, Founder and Editor
Okay, that's not the actual title. Nor is it Bring Me More Gold, I Don't Have Enough Yet And If You Don't I'll Pad Out The Story Even More. No, the third Hobbit film has jettisoned the original There And Back Again title for the much more action-y Battle Of The Five Armies. And there you have it.
Around the Internet:
  • Kurt

    The original title is more classy. You'd think this franchise has made enough money that they do not need to make a title just for a bit more lucre.

  • Pa Kent Says Maybe

    5 armies? Really? Are there FIVE of them? Please, please, please, please tell me they all fight at once, and it isn't one army fights second army, winner fights third, fourth sneaks in with a chair and wallops the third, so the third has to forge an unlikely alliance with the fifth, which, up till then was all, "We're Switzerland," and by the time they're done everybody just wishes they'd draped the belt around the fat belly of the first army, everybody's favorite anyway.

    We're done with Middle Earth and hobbits after this, right? I mean, nobody's gonna take Pete aside and whisper "prequels" in his ear? Right? RIGHT?

    I mean, I was done with them before the seventeenth ending of THE RETURN OF THE KING, but by "we" I mean culture. Like, universal we.

  • Up next: The Silmarillion.

  • Pa Kent Says Maybe

    Is that the one with all the footnotes?

    Hell, Peter Jackson could make a four hour movie for every note.

  • Ard Vijn

    Retitled: The Silly Millions.

  • Kjseo

    I enjoyed the 2nd Hobbit film but it's true: the ending was stretched WAAAAAYYY out. I was surprised that I was falling asleep near the end.

blog comments powered by Disqus
​​